By Sumithra M, Psychologist

“Valentine’s Day can be tough on your mental health, whether you’re in a relationship, or not.”

Historically, much of the advertising around Valentine’s Day has been specifically targeted towards men. This day has been painted by marketers as a day in which men in particular should go out of their way to purchase opulent, flashy gifts for their partners. All of this creates a disproportionate amount of emotional stress in men.

Valentine’s Day blues are a real psychological phenomenon and a form of situational depression that occurs in the weeks following February 14th.

Societal norms dictate that individuals should express their love through grand gestures and extravagant displays of affection.

This pressure can intensify feelings of inadequacy for those who are unable to meet these expectations or find themselves without a romantic partner or tokens of affection. Studies show that 30–40-year-olds likely feel social pressures to develop relationships that match specific expectations and long-term commitment. Celebrations provide evidence of such commitment. By contrast, not receiving Valentine’s Day gifts indicates failure.

How to Handle Emotional Turmoil and Blues

  • Treating oneself with kindness and understanding difficult times improves mental well-being.
  • Self-talk and replace unrealistic negative thoughts about love life with a more balanced perspective.
  • Self-care, relax, and practice to be mindful.
  • Appreciate positive aspects in your relationship life.
  • Plan social activities focusing on shared interests and positive interactions to reinforce the sense of belonging.
  • Perform random acts of kindness contributing to others’ life such as visiting old age homes and orphanages.

If Valentine’s Day tends to trigger negative emotions, plan activities or distractions in advance. Movie night with friends, solo adventure, etc. — having a plan can alleviate the anticipation of negative feelings.

Some of the relationship changes after TBI are difficult and can be painful, but there are many things that couples can do to enjoy each other and their relationship in new, positive, and meaningful ways.

Many couples find that their relationship grows stronger after a spinal cord injury. Some develop a deeper appreciation for each other and a greater sense of intimacy and connection. With the right support, it is possible to overcome challenges in a relationship.